Zombrification

As nice as it is to have donuts and coffee arrive at my door at the start of a busy day, they showed up an hour earlier than planned. Tiah called me and said she was at the donut shop (Annie's) by my house, and would be at the door in ten minutes.
It wasn't even 10:00 yet, and due to overthinking, I hadn't gone to sleep until 3:00am the night before.
So, in walks nutrition, and out of bed I get.........
After a breakfast of donuts, eggs, and halibut, and coffee, the three of us (Bjorn, Tiah, and I) rolled across NE towards The Fresh Pot on Missisipppi for the start of one of my favorite events of the year, "The NOISE Single Speed Rally".
This was the 4th year for this event. Having missed the 1st one, I have no plans to ever miss another. It was about 35 people, a diverse crowd to say the least. We had the old guard of messengers, how are you gonna keep 'em away? Josh brought some new imports from North Carolina with him. Billy Spaceman came back from San Francisco with a few others in tow, and one of the old boys again rode his fixed Tonic Fabrications mt. bike.
The Rally started at High Noon (12:45 messenger time), from the sidewalk outside the coffee shop. Chevil led us across North Portland towards the bluffs, where we picked up the trail at Killingsworth. Moments later, down at the spot known for watching sunsets, Mace got a flat. This flat of course turned into two more by Lucky, and 20 minutes later we were off again, towards the Super Fund Site.
Once we got to the school (U of P), I raced down the hill first to get nice photo ops of everyone doing a little drop, then even better pics of moving all the bikes over the parked train. We then rolled out the big gravel to Bosnia ( ala the Hunted), and had fun hanging out, then a couple of little derby's, which by the way, came down to Tad and Mace, with Mace being the solid winner.

Not far down the tracks we were harrased by the police. How funny is it that through an area that the city is planning to have a nice esplanade type path to St, John's, a little off road ride will get you a big big ticket...... (I think you can thank the religous nuts at U of P for that).

After a few spots with jumps, and more flat repairs, we headed off to Pier Park, where I took the opportunity to ride the new skatepark on my Mt. Bike. I would like to thank Dreamland Skateparks for this addition to Portland.
Eventually, we went off on a pre race lap of the "course". The majority of us followed Dan around the park on a preview of what would be a varied, and certainly frustrating two loops . Back at the container area (where the beer was, of course), we decided that it would be a "Follow the Leader" style race, with the leader required to follow the unmarked course, to the best of his, or her ability. Everyone else of course would be racing to become the leader.
After lap one, It was Tad, Brian, Lucky, and Drew up front, with me and Ryan a little ways back.
This is how we would finish up, as most droppped out to drink beer after lap 1. I recall that some OBRA guys, including the new head of, were racing with u the first lap or so, but I don't believe they rode the second.


The big winner of the NOISE Belt was Tad, and we celebrated with much revelry and beer.
Now sooner had we left the park headed for Fire On The Mt., did the police show up again to hassle the straggler's.
This is exactly why I do not lollygag around much. of course there was no time for slacking, because in two hours the "Zombie Massacre" was going off.
And go off it did. After slogging home for a 20 minute power nap, I raced down to Alberta Park for the start.
80 participants had gathered in the basketball area for some footdown, then the late start of the "Zombie Massacre".
We rode off with instructions not to get bitten by zombies, not to get killed, and not to cheat.
With 6 stops, first in SE, then further SE, then back to Ne, for three stops, then off to deeper Se again, it was at least 32 zombie-filled miles.
The stops were filled with moaning, biting Zombies, alcohol, fake blood, warm fires, and total mayhem.
I had heard the race was over at Joe's house, and didn't ride very hard to 32nd and Powell, the location of the after party.
It turns out that was the end of the race, and I was 13th place, with Lucky winning the big trophy dressed as "Spiderman".
I believe if I had pedaled harder in the end I would have been top 5, but what can you do?
And now on to the party, which, in my mind, turned out to be great. I heard the rookies arguing in the standard "I dare you to walk across the fire" mode.. So, to shut them up, I got up from my chair, walked the 5 feet across the fire, then sat back down. Between that and the trip to the keg, I didn't go far.

It turns out I didn't have to, things kept coming to me. Ted was blotto, and gave someone 30 bucks to go to Safeway, buy wine, and bring it back to me. Needless to say I stayed where I was, with Todd Danger, waiting. The police showed up about the same time the wine did, but didn't slow anyone down much.

The low part of the evening turned out to be the moment of discovering that it was 3:30 AM, and I had a couple hundred blocks to go home....
Into the back door, and straight to the buttermilk bar I had been thinking about the whole way.

Dinner on the river.......

Tonight I rode out Marine Drive to one of my old haunts from the 80's, Salty's. It is my nephew Sammy's birthday, he is 15. Sammy plays hocky on the Fort Vancouver Pioneers, and is very good, probably too good.
My whole family, this time including me, met at 5:30. My ride was as nice as a ride out Marine Drive can be, which is never, ever, very much fun. A whole heck of a lot of money has been spent on bike paths out there. It is truly one of the last places I would want to actually head for on a bike ride. If you pay attention to the direction of the wind, and ride accordingly, the hell can be aleviated slightly. My reccomendation to you is to just ride on the road, as the bike path is along the river side of the dike, and windier than on top of it.
I was seated by a fabulous looking and smelling hostess named Brie. She smiled, was very nice, and made me want to follow her up the stairs to my table.
I had a Jubleale while waiting for my family to arrive (Why is the guy on the bike always there before the cars?) The Jubleale is always good, in my opinion. Everyone started showing up soon after. There is nothing that will make a me happier than when my neice and nephew see me, and race up to give me a hug. ( This only lasts until they turn four, so take it while you can) Lilly and Jaxon are very cute, very funny, and seem to be inseperable. I took some pics of them, and then gave Lilly Grace my camera, so she could take some pics. It turns out a 3 year old takes good pics sometimes.
We ordered many appetizers, as is our habit. We had oysters on the half shell, calamari, some shrimp cooked shell on, and something else that has escaped me.

I enjoyed the oysters, though not as much as my brother and sister, who proclaimed them the best oysters they have had in a while. There was no horseradish or spicy cocktail sauce to go with them, which was a disappointment. The shrimp were good, but quite overcooked. The shell had to be virtually pried off, due to the cooking fiasco, which made for difficulty in my book.
But the calamari, which I generally avoid, having a dislike for tentacles or tubular things, was fabulous. We ate two or three orders of it before dinner. If only I could find a apppetizer made from calamari steak, the real gem of the squid.
I ordered the halibut cheeks, over potatoes and green beans. This was a very good dinner. I recomend it to anybody. The sad thing about halibut cheeks is that they are actually one of the less flavorful parts of the halibut. I beleive that this entree, that has been appearing more frequently over the years, is a ruse by the restaraunt industry to use a generally ignored or thrown away part of the fish. If cooked properly, it can be pulled off, as it was tonight at Salty's.
My dad, Sam, sat next to me, and enjoyed his pork tenderloin. (
I traded him a piece of my cheeks for a piece of his tenderloin, and must say it was also very good.) I suspect it was at least marinated for a while, but probably not as long as I would have done it. But , something broke through, cause it was tender, and slightly pink, as I like it.
My brother had the herb encrusted salmon, which I did not try, but with salmon , it is very hard to cook it bad. And by the way he worked through it, I suspect he enjoyed it.
It appears the highlight of the meal, for the kids anyway, was some corndog, cut up, with french fries, as Lily and Jaxon both hovered over one basket for a while. You can't go wrong sticking to the kids menu.
We had a great time, all 15 of us as it turns out. A hockey player from France is staying with my sister and her family. He is very nice, and very funny.

My father and I decided that we need to go fishing more together, this something we have in common, and it is good for the sole. He and my brother are going to mexico next week to go fishing together, maybe next time I will get to go.
He also told me that after his last fishing trip with my nephew Sammy, in Canada, that Sammy broke some sort of record.
On his first time fly fishing, it appears he became the #11 fly fisherman in Canada, due to what he caught, or how he caught it. I heard the same trip he caught a pike much, much bigger than he was also.
We watched the kids dance a little to the music, shared a White chocolate mouse cake, and I had a very strong latte, thankfully with no foam on it. ( I hate foam, bitter, bitter, bitter!)
All in all we had a fabulous dinner, and a great time.
My family is great.
By the way, all but the food pics were taken by Lilly Grace.

And the rain, rain, rain, came down, down, down, and Dabby started bailing...

Here I sit, on a rainy tuesday. The weekend seems to have gone on forever. It started out after working late on friday, I went to the Ringer's house. This turned into an adventurous, project filled evening, as the Ringer and I have issues with projects.
It turns out he has issues with more than that, for a professed love of stripping tape off a roll was discovered. I also noticed that he took his time, and prolonged the taping process, obviously for his own pleasure......
We lit up the foyer at the Polo House, after I accidentally mentioned how dark it was in there. Then we lit ourselves up with some beers, that Ringer professed were not his......Oh well, we replaced 'em.
Saturday I got up, and rolled into town to CCC, scouting for shiny Italian parts. Luckily there were none, but if anyone wants a 27.0 Thompson, it is in the case. About this time the Ringer called, so we met at the Fuel Cafe, which is nice.
I had a triple latte, and a bagel with butter and cream cheese. Eventually Steve called and said we weren't working anyway, ' 'cause the doors to the school were locked.
The Ringer had this brilliant idea to go clean out the basement. The only bummer for me was the fact that it wasn't either:
My house.
My crap.
Or fun.
I settled in and helped organize about a third of it. I didn't even understand where Ringer was trying to go with it, so I started in on the Polo bikes, deeply in need of repair. Then onto mallets. Beautiful mallets...
Of course, not long after the mallets were made, Eric Spence called up with another one of his good ideas: Frisbee Golf in Peir Park.
We rolled out to St. John's, well, anyway, Divebomb and I did. The 5 of us played a long game of Disc Golf. Watch out for Ryan's crazy throwing form. I thought he was trying to shake a spider out of his shorts. After that, we rolled out to Beefa's house for celebration barbecue of some sort. It was very good, we ate too much food. maggie made some slow roasted pork that was great. I cooked some trout on the barbecue, yes, the same barbecue that Steve burned the deck with that night. Ryan brought a big, and I mean big, bag of oysters that were tasty.
On the way home, I went to Royal Thai on Ne 68th and Sandy. I looked over the menu, but knew full well what I was going to order.
A big scoop of Coconut ice cream, on top of sweetened, sticky rice. It is a great way to end your evening.
And the worst way to start your morning is to hear " Well, you better get out of bed, cause we are on the way to your house"
I had been explaining how my chest still hurt too much to go mt. biking, when I was cut off with that statement. Does not make for a good start to the morning, to say the least.
We went to Scappoose again. I guess it is the best, closest spot, all in all a good choice. The four of us, Ryan, Beefa, Cowboy and I, rolled off down the trails. Scappoose is very fun, once you figure your way around. It appears I am the only one who really has it figures out between us, ( having put in the time with the maps, and google earth, learning the terrain) which put's me in the fun zone of riding in front, but the terror zone of having Cowboy behind me.
We rode for a couple of hours, with , once again, some great wrecks, some fast descents,and the ver funny running commentary from Cowboy. The time came when stove's coach was going to turn back into a pumpkin, so we turned around for the car.
After dropping him off, it was straight to bike polo, to fill out the rest of the afternoon with refreshments and more biking.
There was a good crowd, new mallets, and some fixed bikes of course, so all was great.


I must have played 6 games, and scored some points. Beefa showed up with Sophia and Maggie, Cowboy and C Murder hung out, hell, even Mary Lou showed up.
I ended up at my house in the middle of the evening, just in time for a nap, then onto a hot date......
Life is good.

There's got to be a morning after..

It turns out that after my last post, I did go out on the bike again. This time I got on my fixed gear, and went up the hill (6 blocks) to Vien Hong, at about 68th and Sandy. We had the spring rolls, which were good, but light on flavor, and heavy on cabbage. I pride myself on making great spring rolls, so I am hyper-critical of them. I then had the Cashew Chicken, which was very good. My friend had the Pad Thai, which I thought was good too. The service was great, and the tea was served in a little press pot, which helps if you like to steep more than normal.
After the dinner, I went over to the Hungry Tiger, for the "Midnight Mystery Ride". I have been on a few of these, and sometimes they are even fun.
It turns out about 170 cyclists showed up, and as I got there right before midnight, it was a while before I got a refreshment.
We did a little rolling around, here and there, eventuallly cruising through the Rose City cemetery. Here waited Elvis himself, with some scary stories, if you were near enough to hear.
A keg was tapped, and so was I by 3:00, when I found myself leaving the cemetery.
The next morning I went to Jim and Pattie's for coffee, sat for quite a while, relaxing.
About the time I got home, Disco called me to say he had something like 17 bottles of wine at his house, and how come I was not there yet?
Needless to say, I rolled right on over. There was good food, good times, and even the El Chupa Cowboy showed up......
I left after 7 hours of barbequing, rolled home and into bed.
Early the next morning, as I began getting ready to go mountain biking, I realized had limited mobility in my right chest area. I decided not to go, and called Ryan to let him know.
He wasn't out of bed yet, and I wondered why.
Then I heard the rain outside, and knew why Ryan was still in bed.
He apparently wasn't going riding in the rain either...

Oh the pain....

Today I hit a tree. It was not a very big one, but it doesn't take much when a tree is involved.
Ryan, Beefa, Natashia and I started out at Disco's house, at about 9:30. My ride there through the fog made me wish I had some of Elton John's windshield wiper sunglasses, as it was very thick and sticking to my specs. Disco turned out to be grounded, and couldn't go, but that was made up for by the hot cup of coffee I got from his kitchen. Divebomb came with us to the Stepping Stone in NW Portland, for breakfast. After a two eggs, ham, toast, and hashbrowns, and making it through watching them drink a orange juice filled smoothie ( I can't even look at O.J.), we parted ways with Divebomb, and headed for the trails outside of Scappoose.
Afetr parking at the trailhead, we rolled up, and did the "Wheel Off" trail first. This trail is named for the fact that Ryan, on our first or second trip there, did not tighten his wheel properly, and did a fine flying endo. ending up wedged between two logs, right on the edge of the drop. I was mere feet behind him, and it was very gymnastic, and, after realizing he wasn't hurt, very funny.
We proceeded to cruise down and up many of the fine trails available. This is private land, on which the owner and the members of PUMP have made alot of riding, including loops, drops, big jumps, little jumps, logs to ride, ladders to ride, great short downhills, and much, much more.
It was in an area we call "North Shore", where I had my little incident. In the past, I had ridden this ladder obstacle cleanly, even on my polo bike with only one back brake. It flows fairly straight for maybe 20 feet, then drops off about 5 feet steeply, then down a hill.
I made the first section no problem, then rolled over the end. The angle of the exit ramp puts you onto your front wheel in landing, so I rolled off it in endo form. The main problem is the tree located right in front of the landing, maybe 5 feet away.
This is the tree I endoed into. When riding on your front wheel alone directly into a tree, your options tend to be very few.
I realized I had to take the hit, and jump over the handlebars at the same time.
My bike hit one part of the tree, and I made it clean over the handlebars, only to hit the tree next to hit with 4 different parts of my body. I took a scrape all the way down my left arm, a scrape to my left knee, a bigger scrape on my right leg, and, the fun part, a direct hit to the ribs on the main part of the tree.
Knocked the wind out of me a little, though I got back on the bike like nothing happened (I am sometimes ignorant).
Now, about three hours later, I am about to go out on another ride, to help my friend learn mounts and dismounts for cyclocross. But my body wants to stay right here, on my bed. The only part that hurts much still where I got slammed in the ribs. I guess I better go riding today, cause I won't feel like it at all tommorrow.
This is the price we pay for fun. Sometimes it is very high..........

Whiner's Bio

Today is the first day of the rest of my life. It is only 1:00. If this is any indication of what the rest of my life willl be like, stop the world, I wanna get off.
Total frustration. Waiting for things to happen, yet not doing much towards that really. My coffee sits beside me. Waiting...
"Drink me" it says.
" Dammit, I am working on it!" I bark at my cup, as I go back to the kitchen to reheat it, again. Is this what today brings?
What the hell is in store for tommorrow?
Mt. biking at 9am. This means I spend part of today tuning my Fat Chance, which really doesn't need tuning at all. If only I wasn't so anal, this would all be much easier. I need to put a new tire on it though, and scout some different pedals out of my scads of bike parts. It is nice when your feet actually stay in the pedal, at least most of the time.
My kingdom for some new brake pads. I played some "Bike Polo" last night, once again on the Fat Chance, a bike which I swore at the beginning of the summer I was never going to play polo on again. This is the main reason I need to replace the rear tire.
I am a skidding fool. I rip through tires like a tornado through a trailer park. Tire sponsers needed, apply within.
Those days when i was young, locking up the rear wheel and skidding down the hill. They prepared me for the live I lead now.
There is nothing finer than a strategically placed, sideways skid, putting yourself into position to steal the ball, and take out the guy you just jacked it from....
This is my life.
It doesn't get any better than this....or does it?